It's time for a change, I think.
Life gets hectic sometimes, and sometimes in the hedonism of trying to capture it all, we lose sight of the little things. For example... sometimes the simplest things are the best of things.
So this is a good time for a change, I think.
As good as any, at the very least.
So won't you come tumbling down the rabbit hole with me?
I am presently undergoing some career-changing process. It's a decision that took a long while coming. It's amazing what a second-opinion can do for you, really. In this case, it took colleagues, family, superiors and friends to make me realise just how bent out of shape I was trying to make everyone around me happy. And in this job, it's never easy to make everyone happy. So I was told that I can't keep going on like this: I was avoiding friends and family, I was either at work or asleep, and even that I wasn't sleeping much. And when I finally stopped to look at where I have been and what I've done to myself, I think it was finally time for me to understand that I can't go on anymore. It was time for a change. Fortunately, some of my colleagues and superiors agreed.
So since the summer I've been on a modified schedule and spending time outside of my own discipline with the fully-fledged intention to switch out when the opportunity presents itself. It was a tad late in coming, perhaps. But then again, the White Rabbit is always late, isn't he?
Perhaps this is the beginning of a new path, or maybe I've just plunged into the Rabbit Hole (wait, that's my home, isn't it?
) But I guess I have finally realised just how tired I was and I was tired of being tired. I was tired of always having to screw up my courage and resistance in place for the sake of others. I am tired of being "Almost good enough" in entirely too many things. Too often I think to myself that I need to be better - no, "I want to be better!" - but while the spirit is willing, the flesh was too weak. So it's time for the doctor to heal himself, it seems. Just as I've been saying, it's not a sin to take care of oneself; because if you fall, what happens to those who depend on you?
So, thank you very much for everyone who has been here with me. I can't thank you enough for keeping me up during the endless nights or the mental breaks you afford me through your conversations and creative output. To the best of my abilities, I'll keep going to entertain you for as long as I can. And now that things have started to grind down a notch, perhaps it wouldn't be quite as difficult as it was before to keep trucking along. And perhaps, perhaps... I might even get to keep my head this time around!
So... thanks for taking the leap of faith and following the White Rabbit. Speaking of which...
We're getting closer to 40,000 views. If you're that special someone... let me know, won't you? And let me know what I can do for you! List of things to do
Rumpelstiltskin from "Once Upon A Time."
1. Yes, that's me in the photos. I took them in my apartment today using a webcam. Sorry about the quality! I would say "please don't use them, but who would want to use a photo showing my apartment?
2. The "White Rabbit" concept, of course, came from the incomparable Lewis Carroll and his novel "Alice in Wonderland."
3. The white-suited rabbit version? Inspired by Kiyo Kyujuo's manga version of Trinity Blood. More specifically, the character Cain Knightlord in "Stand By Me." Reference here: www.zerochan.net/1666608#full
4. Yes, the rabbit is wearing -that- ring ( this one: dc496.4shared.com/img/-qQj7Qww… But it has a bigger brother now. You can see it on the Rabbit's lapel in the last picture. Not half bad!